Category Archives: stupidity

Don’t try to hide.

I’m writing this post FROM THE AIRPLANE. The time has finally come for WiFi everywhere. The plane used to be the only place I could escape into a truly analog world– I’d read a stack of magazines, half a good book, write until my hand cramped up, not have to worry about anyone trying to get in touch with me (‘Sorry, I’m about to get on a plane to Seattle, be in touch in 6 hours!’)– what sweet relief! Now there will be no reprieve from hyper-connectivity and carpel tunnel syndrome. Today is a sad, sad day for us all (she cries after paying $12.95 for the privilege….).

I guess I should learn how to darn a sock.

Darling Boyfriend sent this charming little chart to me yesterday. Evidently, I would be approximately the worst wife ever. I send shirts missing buttons to the tailor, go to church only for the odd wedding or funeral, have chronically chilly feet and ‘dress’ for breakfast in yoga pants and flip flops, which I would doubt counts in my favor. I guess I’d earn a few points for being quick to bed, loving children and making a mean Velvetta queso for those unexpected guests… but where are the merits for hating chick flicks and loving beer?

Yeah, hi, I’ll take a medium iced coffee, a blueberry cheese danish and an insult to my intelligence. THANKS.


fat free water

Originally uploaded by thenavigatrix

Oh my god, have I been drinking full-fat water this whole time?!!? I hope it’s at least been low-fat… I must buy all my water from Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf from now on. But oh shit, are they in New York or just the west coast?? Must buy cases while in LA and ship them back east so as not to get fat ass and cankles.